on becoming...

i am discovering that even in my 30's now, i am still such a work in progress. not that i thought any differently, but it is just strange to know that personality stuff i have dealt with forever is still going strong.

i wish i knew the secret to changing things about my personality. i wish i could just *not* be a particular way any more. but, i suppose, with 30 years of practice, it will take a bit more than a waive of a magic wand to change.

at the church sermon last week, the message was surrendering to god. i think this is definitely an area where i need to surrender myself and let god work in me. i have always had my insecurities and their manifestations in various parts of my life. i think, at 30, it is time to be more confident and self assured.